Want to hear about one of my Woke Up Worthy moments? Read on…
In 2015, I quit my job as a prosecutor to pursue my solo law practice. I thought this move would allow me to set my own hours and leave the impact I wanted in the world.
Initially, things were great. I loved my business, clients, and autonomy. But then it all started to change. I felt increasingly like I wasn’t ENOUGH. I cried every day, and small tasks like mailing letters became impossible to do.
It took a pretty major breakdown in front of a friend for me to finally acknowledge that something was wrong. I started seeing a therapist who diagnosed me with depression. The therapist helped me make small changes in my life and encouraged me to consider taking time off from my business. This meant no clients, no money coming in, and no work until I was well.
Now, this was scary.
I’ve had a job since I was 14 years old. So the idea of taking time off for my mental health seemed preposterous. I also didn’t have a safety net. There was no significant other in the picture at the time. No trust fund or savings accounts full of cash. In fact, I knew that I would run out of money pretty quickly.
Additionally, as a Black woman, I felt like I didn’t have the luxury of being depressed. People of color, especially women, only get one chance to do things right, and I was afraid I would miss my shot if I stopped working to address my health.
I had a choice — I could continue doing the same things and suffer or take time off and give myself the care I truly needed.
I chose the latter, and it wasn’t easy. I had to do many things that made people talk like move in with my sister and nanny for her children as a woman in her 30s with a law degree. I also sold my condo and moved to a different state without a legal job, a plan, or any idea of when I would be well enough to work again.
Still, I am most proud of this Woke Up Worthy moment. I didn’t ignore my health to keep pushing through as women of color are conditioned to do. I didn’t deny myself the healthcare, rest, and support I needed because of the fear of the financial fallout. I was uncomfortable in the short term because I believed my decision would expand my growth in the long run, and I trusted myself in that belief.
Because of that decision, I’ve experienced more peace, joy, fun, fulfillment, and love than I ever imagined. I started a coaching business, got closer to my family and friends, met and married my husband, and truly loved myself unconditionally.
Still, it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows. There were challenges, fears, and debt along the way. But now, I know that I can trust myself to make it through any challenge instead of being afraid and making decisions to avoid the unknown at all costs.
I’m sure this story resonates on some level with you. I know you’ve been sitting in a cycle of indecision on a huge life decision for a while now. Maybe you’d like to take time off to manage your health, move across the country, change careers, stop the misery cycle with your partner, or show up in your life as the person you were always meant to be.
Let this post be your permission slip to take control of your destiny. Jump in. Take action. Make the hard choices. Ground yourself in your worth and take action. I promise you are worth it.
